Hello -
I have proceeded to set up a blog space so as to have a journal of 'happenings' in my life. Currently, the main subject will be devoted to my precious and dear parents, Jack & Eula. I want to bring you up to date which may take me several postings. To begin with, my dad is 93.5 years old. He is in fairly decent physical health for his age, but his mind is beginning to forget a whole lot of stuff he use to be able to handle. Dad is very hard of hearing but refuses to wear his hearing aid. His three daughters are convinced that it is a 'vain' issue with him. He also has macular degeneration and has very poor eyesight. He is dependent upon his caregiver, Mary, to drive him wherever he needs to go for whatever reason. His driver's license was revoked after his situation was brought to the attention of the DMV by his three girls. (We're in the picture.) This continues to be a very sore subject with him and he holds it against us even though he says he is 'okay' with it and knows he doesn't need to be driving. More on this particular issue later.
Mother just turned 88 years old this month and she suffers with alzheimer's disease. She needs help with about every aspect of daily life although she seems fairly happy and content to merely sit in her recliner and cut out pictures from magazines. She tapes them on the wall for all to enjoy. There are old Christmas cards mixed in with pictures of dogs, cats, flowers, scenery, etc. It's her home and her wall so who cares if it makes her happy. Mother has trouble walking but has to this date refused to let us put her in the transport chair we bought. She is not an invalid, she just can't walk and we are terrible daughters for asking her to embarrasse herself and just ride in the chair. More on this topic later too ----
I could go on and on. I sit here thinking of things to tell you about and I'm getting excited about the prospect of letting all this emotion 'out'. You are going to be my sounding board -- dear blog spot.
All for now ----
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Great start, Janice. I know it is difficult, humorous, and sad all at the same time. God will surely bless you for honoring and caring for your parents as you have and continue to do. Jack and Eula have done so much for so many for so long. It is most difficult to become the parent. How do you think our kids are going to do with it? Mine tell me what to do already. Maybe it's time.
ReplyDeleteThanks for being my first 'follower', Roxy --- and thanks for encouraging me to do this. It IS hard and at times I question God about why they are still 'here' because they seem so sad so often. I just know that I have to trust Him when it comes to them. We'll understand it by and by.
ReplyDeleteAll of us need to cleanse our souls from time to time and I think you have found a good way to unleash all that pent up emotional garbage. I'm looking forward to following your blog, sister.
ReplyDeleteWonderful start, Janice! I feel like I already know your parents personally. I know this blog will help you sort out your feelings, lift some weight off your shoulders, and allow you to vent your frustrations a little. I look forward to reading about the trials and tribulations of The Three Sisters!!
ReplyDeleteI'm so proud of you, sis. This is not only therapy for you, but for me and Joan as well. Can't wait for the next chapter!
ReplyDeleteJanice, your story sounds alot like many families that are dealing with their elderly parents and the sad disease of Alzheimer's. I don't know if you know or not but daddy's wife Helen Slauson has dementia and hasn't known anyone for sometime now and my Aunt Tut who was my mother's only sibling had it...both are deceased now so I know first-hand what you and your sisters are dealing with and continue to deal with. My mom died of colon cancer at the age of 59 back in 1985...so very young and she fought that battle for 4 long years...if she had lived she would of been 84 years old yesterday in fact. There's hardly a day that goes by that I don't think of her. Daddy of course will be 84 next month....he is a handful, too...his mind is going and some days gone! All the things you mentioned about your dad struggling to keep his independence is some of the same issues that our family has dealt with him, too.
ReplyDeleteDon't feel guilty about how you feel....I know there are days especially the last couple of years that I thought it would of been a blessing for daddy to have passed on the day after we buried his second wife Eleanor Jamieson Slauson in 1999, ten years ago this past March...when he suffered his 2nd major heart attack than to deal with some of the things my 4 brothers and I have had to deal with...His misuse of medication, becoming violent, seeing and hearing things you never expected coming out of his mouth! It's like he is another person...a total stranger. So I don't know which case is the hardest...losing a parent at a very young age like my mom or losing a parent like my dad...who is still here physically but not really here mentally the majority of the time! I just wanted you and your sisters to know that you are not alone....me and my family feels your pain. I tell Keith after every episode with Daddy, I hope I want be this difficult for our boys when I get older! But, like Keith's always tell his clients in planning their finances...you may not always be training your train, so you need to be prepared!....Sorry, I've rattled off too much...I guess I'm doing some venting,also! I love you blog...keep it up...I truly believe like I told you in Facebook that it helps you heal and get through things to journal!!!
Cheryl, thank you so much for 'rattling on'. You have confirmed to me that my sisters and I are not alone. From what you said, some days we laugh and some days we cry. It's just natural when dealing with issues of dementia and alzheimer's disease in those we love. I SO wish I had started this over a year ago. It's going to be a good thing for me.
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