The Bible tells us that if we honor our parents that our days will be long upon the earth. Well ----- I have some mixed feelings about that. I know God understands. IF I find myself in the situation that my parents are currently in, I would pray that God would just take me home to that glorious place He promised --- Heaven. The thing that bothers me most is the fact that Jack and Eula seem so unhappy and discontented. I understand, I truly do. They lead a very active lifestyle for so long and now they are dependent on others for almost everything in their lives. It pains my heart to see my dad's depression and to see his struggle to remain a 'man' -- in control of what is left of his life. His girls use to worry about things he would do like using his riding mower to cut the grass, using the weedeater, the electric hedge clippers, etc. We have come to understand that he likes doing his own yard work. If this gives him pleasure, we accept the fact that if something bad happens, he will go to be with God with a smile on his face --- doing something he likes to do. Don't get me wrong, we tried to convince him to let his family or even a 'paid' yard person do the yards. He has plowed into the back of his car with the riding mower because he couldn't see what gear it was in. He put a good dent in the bumper but doesn't admit that it's 'that' bad. He has cut the extension cord countless numbers of times with the hedge clippers because he can't see where the cord is while he is trimming. And, he has gotten too hot and has passed out in the yard. Upon waking up, there is no one to hear him call for help. He continues to want to work in the yard anyway. He has also been known to climb the ladder to clean out the gutters, use the chain saw to cut big limbs, climb into the attic to fix a water pipe when it was over 120 degrees up there. We rejoice that he is finally too weak to start the chain saw now. To help us feel somewhat better about his work in the yard, we asked dad to please do this when Mary is there so she can 'watch' him and know if he needs help or passes out again. He usually will wait, however, until she has gone home before he ventures out. It concerns us that mother cannot hear him when he calls her. At least she hasn't yet when he has passed out twice before. Even if she DID hear him, we know she could not help him get up and we wonder if she would even know how to go back in the house to call 911 or any of her girls. Here again, if God takes our daddy while he is in the yard, we are okay with this and we will praise His name for taking daddy on to Heaven. I talk big -- like we have quit worrying about him. I'm not fooling anyone -- we still worry. We just don't know what else to do. Is this a pleasure that we should keep trying to deprive him of in his last days or should we just let him alone to enjoy himself in his own yard? We will continue to take care of him when he cuts off an arm, or breaks a hip, or has a concussion from a fall. We just love him but we admit to wanting to strangle him sometimes. Is God testing us? Hmmmmmm .................